First date conversation tips

Make sure that what you say on a first date sounds like music to her ears, not screeching brakes. Though what she wants you to say depends on the situation, you can always alter these suggestions to suit your circumstances. A successful first date conversation has less to do with what you say and more with how you say it. Below are some tips to help you talk your way to a second date.

SMILE
Smiling is a great way to cut the awkwardness of the first date. Smile often, and your date will feel more relaxed and comfortable around you immediately.

REMEMBER YOUR MANNERS
Treat your date with respect and remember to be courteous and kind during the date. It’s completely acceptable to goof up or slip up once in a while, just as long as you shrug the accident off with a laugh instead of appearing nervous or awkward. In fact, a silly slip up can actually make the evening more fun and memorable.

HAVE CONFIDENT BODY LANGUAGE

First dates can be nerve-racking for the sheer fact that you don't always know what to expect. However, there are a few tricks to looking confident even when you're quaking in your heels. First, maintain eye contact throughout your conversation (but don't over-do it; it's not a staring contest!) If you feel your voice becoming shaky, stop for a moment and take a deep breath before you resume speaking. Also, watch for any nervous behaviors like tapping your fingers on the table or shaking your foot. Besides potentially annoying your date, they are dead giveaways that you're anxious. When all else fails, acknowledge the elephant in the room and admit you are excited to be there, but feeling a little jittery. (He's probably nervous too.)

THINGS TO TALK ABOUT

During the first conversation, avoid asking about their past relationships or their future plans. Both of you aren’t dating yet, so asking questions that are too personal too early into the date can make you appear nosy or intrusive. Ask the right questions though, and your date will open up to you and may even fall for you before the end of the date.

DON'T BE A CHATTERBOX

Sometimes we get so wrapped up in wanting our date to like us that we forget that we're supposed to be evaluating his potential as well. Counteract this and avoid talking too much by asking him fun, insightful questions that will helpfully reveal what he's passionate about. Some ideas to jump-start the conversation: Do you have any siblings? How about pets? Where has been your favorite place to travel to? Have you read any good books or seen any films recently? Don't forget to follow-up on what he's saying if anything in particular catches your interest.

KEEP YOUR ANSWERS CONCISE AND UPBEAT

On a first date, you don't want to be guilty of TMI. You both are just getting to know one another, so it's best to accentuate the positive, as the saying goes. For example, if you're currently unemployed (which is understandable in this grim economy) and he asks you what you do for a living, just mention that you're currently between jobs and looking. Don't go on and on about what a jerk your former boss was and how unfair it was that they laid you off. You risk turning him off and giving him the impression that you're a high-drama person, even if you're not.

 BE PREPARED

Besides, waxing your legs and teasing your hair, brushing up on current events, both nationally and in your community, can come in handy on a first date, especially if the conversation should slow at some point. Even if you're not a news buff, skimming a newspaper or taking a quick scroll through cnn.com should suffice, as men love to explain things anyway. Avoid sensitive subjects such as politics and religion, however.

KEEP THE DATE SHORT

At this point, you should be well on your way to becoming an expert on at dating small talk however, even when you're feeling major sparks, resist the temptation to do a marathon date or talk to each other all night long. It's always best to leave them wanting more, so be sure to save something to chat about on the second date.